Living on the Edge
By Jennifer Haynes

BENJAMIN SHERMAN is a rich man from Kalamazoo, Michigan. HAROLD GOMPERS runs the Flat Earth Society. He preached to the world that he could prove himself true, but would only show his evidence to those who could pay him a handsome amount of cash. BENJAMIN couldn’t hold back out of curiosity, and agreed to pay HAROLD $10,000 if he made him a believer. HAROLD is sitting in a small home office, and BENJAMIN is sitting across from him.

 BENJAMIN: So it is to my understanding that you can prove the world is flat. Is that true?

 HAROLD: Yes.

 BENJAMIN: Well, Mr., uhhh, Gompers, won’t you show me? I’ve got $10,000 on this thing.

 HAROLD: Mr. Sherman, or may I call you Benjamin? (Benjamin nods) Benjamin, I have to get a little bit more out of it than money. I live for the argumentation. Are you not going to try to prove me wrong first? I notice you have papers in your hand. 

BENJAMIN: (clears throat) It’s hard to see. Open the blinds on the window…

HAROLD: (interrupting) If it’s too dark, turn on the light. The switch is over there. (he sits and waits for BENJAMIN to move)

 BENJAMIN: (gets up and turns on the light, then sits down again) Look, Harold, if this is some sort of joke…

 HAROLD: It’s not a joke. (He pauses) Please, show me the papers. I’m sorry if I upset you.

 BENJAMIN: (Ignores the comment) I have invested more money into research than you could ever dream of making, research that proves I’m right and you’re wrong! I don’t want to waste my time listening to all this bull you hand out for free! (He looks down angrily) I take that back…you hand it out for $10,000 is what you do!

 HAROLD: Sir, I promise you that this visit will not be a waste of time. All I’ve asked is that you try to prove me wrong. I’ll give you double your money back if you can make me change my mind.

 BENJAMIN: (sighing angrily) All right, here. These are satellite pictures. And here are some scientific measurements. (he hands the papers to HAROLD) My scientists use only state of the art equipment, since I can afford it that is. I wouldn’t allow them to use anything less than the best, because the more expensive and well built something is, the more accurate it is. And accuracy is what we’re shooting for here.

 HAROLD: (seems to mull over the papers) This is very interesting evidence, Benjamin. And compelling, I might add. But, it’s all just a lot of numbers. I don’t see any real meaning behind any of them. And these pictures? They’re taken with an indifferent machine. They aren’t meant to capture the beauty or…

 BENJAMIN: (interrupting) Beauty is not the issue here. I’m showing you the earth is round, and I want you to try to prove to me it’s not. I’m beginning to think this is all phony. You don’t seem to really have any idea how to prove it to me, do you? And besides, if the earth was flat, how would that make it more beautiful than it is?

 HAROLD: That’s precisely the question. (he glances up) Since you think it’s round, how does that make it any more beautiful?

 BENJAMIN: Well, I don’t guess it does really…but, I don’t understand how that’s relevant.

 HAROLD: (calmly) It’s all a matter of perception. What you say is round could be flat to someone else. Adjectives are all a matter of perception. Define flat. Or define round, whichever is easier.

 BENJAMIN: (shifts uncomfortably) I suppose flat would be having the ability to walk to the edge and then it would just drop off…or round would be like walking in a straight line and coming back…oh, (he throws his hands up in frustration) what difference does it make? I don’t know how to define it.

 HAROLD: (points to a piece of paper) What color is that?

 BENJAMIN: The paper? White. What other color would it be?

 HAROLD: I say it’s blue.

 BENJAMIN: What? Are you blind?

 HAROLD: No, but I think it looks blue. Actually, I don’t know what color it is. In preschool we were taught the sky was blue and the grass was green. But how do I know that? The grass might be purple, or yellow, in fact, what you perceive as green might even be black. It’s all a matter of perception. (a pause) Are you a religious man?

 BENJAMIN: Yes, I consider myself to be. I’ve read the Bible, I go to church every Sunday, I pray every night, I make large contributions, and I believe in God. I guess I do everything people constitute as religious.

 HAROLD: And you put much faith in science, correct?

 BENJAMIN: (hesitantly) Yes.

 HAROLD: (leans back, finally putting the papers down) So, which is true? The Big Bang or Genesis?

 BENJAMIN: What kind of question is that?

 HAROLD: An insightful one.

 BENJAMIN: I’ll pretend you didn’t say that. You did not just insult me.

 HAROLD: Okay, go ahead, I didn’t, but which is true?

 BENJAMIN: How dare you question my religion! That is insulting! (He stands abruptly) I don’t have to sit here and take that from anyone, especially someone who can’t even afford a real office and has to work from home…

 HAROLD: (interrupting calmly) I’ll pretend you didn’t just say that and tell you that I was only questioning your belief in science. Not in religion. I wouldn’t ever dare do that. You’re questioning my intelligence.

 BENJAMIN: (acting aghast) I am not!

 HAROLD: Yes you are. Do you really think I’m stupid enough to insult a man with such power as you?

 BENJAMIN: (he pauses) It’s primitive to believe the earth is flat. No man in his right mind would think that…

 HAROLD: So I take it that I’m not in my right mind. I see.

 BENJAMIN: (slams his fist down angrily on the desk) Damn it, the world is not flat! You don’t have to be rich like me to realize that! I have invested so many dollars…

 HAROLD: …into research, I know, I know. You told me. Why are you getting so frustrated? This is just a little argument, friendly, nothing to get worked up about. I guess you can’t handle questions that make you think. Money can’t buy anyone a decent mind.

 BENJAMIN: (gritting his teeth) It’s not that I can’t handle questions…

 HAROLD: Then I guess you just can’t handle thinking you might be wrong. You know I have evidence here. But you just don’t know what, and you’re afraid.

 BENJAMIN: Of what?

 HAROLD: That I might be right. Of the unknown. Of the fact that your rich technology might have failed you.

 BENJAMIN: Well, I have never been so insulted…

 HAROLD: Everyone needs to be insulted from time to time. Shows them they’re only human just like the rest of us who don’t have everything handed to us on a silver platter.

 BENJAMIN: Are you saying that because I’m rich, that makes me stupid? I bet you’re jealous I have money. There’s no point in my staying here any longer. You don’t respect me enough to show respect, and you can just keep the money. Consider it a donation. I don’t need it.

 HAROLD: Are you saying that because I’m not rich, that makes me stupid? And you seem to think money is all I yearn for. That isn’t true. You have money coming out of your ears, and I have no desire to be like you. I refuse to take your money. I won’t take “donations.” Sit down. I still intend to prove that you are not always right.

 BENJAMIN: (sitting angrily) Whatever you want. Just hurry it up.

 HAROLD: (picks up a phone and calls in his secretary) (SECRETARY SUSAN enters) Susan, I have a few questions to ask you.

 SUSAN: Okay.

 HAROLD: You didn’t always believe the world was flat, did you? (SUSAN shakes her head) But you do now? (SUSAN nods her head) Would you mind telling Benjamin here why that is?

 SUSAN: Oh, Harold proved me wrong. I didn’t think I’d ever see it, but there’s no way you can deny what he’ll show you. You can forget all that technological stuff. This is beyond science.

 BENJAMIN: Is this some sort of joke?

 SUSAN: No, sir! Can I tell him, Harold? (HAROLD nods) Harold lives on the edge of the world!

 (BENJAMIN starts laughing)

 HAROLD: (after BENJAMIN stops laughing) Thank you, Susan. You may leave now. (SUSAN exits) So, are you ready? I know I am. The sooner I show you, the sooner you’ll be out of my life.

 BENJAMIN: (recomposing himself) Yes, please show me. That poor secretary. I may have to leave some cash behind for her too. (almost starts to laugh again)

 HAROLD: We don’t want your money. And before I show you this I just want to apologize for what I’ve said. Your ego was floating way too high. I had to pop it. You left me no choice.

 BENJAMIN: (getting angry again) Just show me whatever it is, okay? I’m tired, and I’d like to go home.

 HAROLD: Okay then. Just hand me that pencil. (BENJAMIN hands HAROLD a pencil) (HAROLD opens the blinds on the window and BENJAMIN gasps) Watch this. (HAROLD opens the window and drops the pencil out) (BENJAMIN jumps up and runs to the window)

 BENJAMIN: Oh my God…what in the world? That can’t be! (he looks at HAROLD with wild eyes) There’s nothing but black! Where did the earth go? Where is it?

 HAROLD: Susan already told you. I live on the edge of the world.

 BENJAMIN: But that’s not possible! When my limo pulled up I saw all around your house. Where will that pencil end up?

 HAROLD: (looking out the window) I don’t know. Probably where it was meant to be. (he pauses) What do you think?

 BENJAMIN: I have to go. This is too much to handle. (BENJAMIN starts to leave and pauses in the doorway) I will leave a check with your secretary. I gotta go home. I need to fire my scientists. I need to hire some new ones.

 (BENJAMIN exits)

 HAROLD: (calls in secretary for the money, gets it, and the secretary leaves. He sighs) What a day. (He reaches out the window and retrieves the pencil. He looks at it, then speaks to it) Technology can do so much these days. But I guess it’s not hard to fool a man blinded by money (HAROLD places the pencil with the others on his desk, saying, “where you’re meant to be,” then grabs his coat and check, and leaves.)